乌兰巴托的夜蒙语歌:自我防御

自我防御 

你曾经在电影中见到过这样的场景：一个女生正在走过一个偏僻的停车场。突然，一个外表邪恶的人从一辆suv后面跳了出来。女生用钥匙刺向他，或者她可能朝这个男人的敏感部位踢去。总之，在这个男人因为疼痛而扭曲着身体的时候，这个女生快速钻进她的汽车，迅速朝安全的地方开去。 

那只是电影而已。这才是真实的场景再现：当这个女生准备刺向或者踢这个男人的时候，他知道她要做什么，并且抓住了这个女生的胳膊（或者腿），将她摔倒在地上。现在，这个女生处在了很不利于自我防御的位置，而且她无法跑掉。 

很多人认为自我防御是对着袭击自己的人来一个空手道似踢腿，踢向袭击者的下腹部，或者刺向对方的眼睛。其实，自我防御实际上意味着做一切可能的措施以避免同袭击自己的人交手。自我防御应该是通过你的智慧而不是拳头来实现的。 

使用你的头脑 

受到威胁的人（男生还有女生）为了自我防御而还手，通常会使得情况恶化。袭击者本身就处在不安，易受刺激的状态，可能变得更加愤怒更加有暴力倾向，谁知道还会发生什么。处理任何受到的攻击或者攻击的威胁，就是设法逃跑。这样做，你受到伤害的可能性最小。 

一个避免可能受到袭击的办法是相信你的直觉。你的直觉同常识可以帮助你摆脱麻烦。比如，如果你正独自在学校跑到上跑步，突然，你感觉你正在被人盯着，这可能是你的直觉告诉你的东西。你的常识将告诉你回到人多的地方是个好办法。 

袭击者并不总是从黑暗的小路上跳出来的陌生人。不幸的是，青少年可能被他们认识的人袭击。这就需要另一项重要的自我防御技能。这项技能是自我防御专家和谈判专家所称的—逐步缓和 

逐步缓和一种形势指的是通过一种谈话或者行动方式阻止事情变得更恶劣。最典型的逐步缓和的例子是把钱给抢劫者而不是常识反抗或者逃跑。不过，逐步缓和也可以通过其他方式进行。比如，如果一个人趁没有其他人在场时骚扰你，你可以通过答应他们的要求以缓和形势。当然，你不需要真正相信他们，你只是运用言辞缓和一个紧张的场合。接下来你可以重新引导这些人的注意力，然后平静走出这个场合。 

一些诸如不发脾气这样的简单事情，可以缓和形势。学习如何管理自己的愤怒，这样你可以与对方交谈或者走开，而不需要使用你的拳头或者武器。 

不过，逐步缓和形势并不总是有用，只有当你保持镇定，并且没有给予可能的袭击者任何额外的刺激时，这种方法才能发挥作用。无论对方是一个陌生人或者是一个你曾经认为可以信任的人，不说不做威胁到袭击你的人的事情，可以你获得对形势的一些掌控。 

降低你的风险：

自我防御的另一方面是，做有助于保持你自身安全的事情。这里有一些来自国家犯罪防御委员会和其他专家的建议： 

了解你自己周围的环境。在开放的，明亮的，交通方便的地方行走或者约会。熟悉你走过的建筑，停车场，公园和其他地方。尤其注意一些可以藏匿人的地方，比如楼梯和树丛。 

避免走穿过偏僻地区的小路。

如果你在晚上外出，群体行动。

确保你的朋友和父母知道你每日的安排（课程，锻炼，俱乐部聚会，等等）。如果你去约会或者同朋友去吃宵夜，让别人知道你将去的地方和你预计返回的时间。

检查一下你外出约会的地方。它们是否看起来安全？你在那里是否感到舒适？问一下你自己，你周围的人是否看起来能分享你在有趣事情上的观点，如果你认为他们是危险之人，离开他们。

确保你的身体语言显示出了自信感，看起来你知道你将要去的地方并且有警觉性。

当搭乘公共交通时，坐在靠近司机的地方并且保持清醒。袭击者找的是容易受到攻击的目标。

如果可能的话，携带一部手机。确定手机中提前设置好你父母的电话号码。

愿意将邻居中和学校中的犯罪报告给警察。

 参加一个自我防御培训班 

让自己有准备还击一名袭击者的最好方式，实际上也是唯一的方式，就是参加一个自我防御培训班。我们愿意在一篇文章中告诉你左右正确的行为，但是有些东西你必须亲身学习后才能掌握。 

一个好的自我防御培训班可以教授你如何衡量一种形势，并且决定如何去做。自我防御培训班同样可以教授特殊的技巧和其他的东西，当你被袭击者抓住时，这些技能可以帮助你摆脱他们。比如，袭击者通常预计他们的袭击对象可能的反应，比如踢他们的下腹部或者刺他们的眼睛。一个好的自我防御培训班可以教授你做出让袭击者不曾预料到的反应，并且在他们猝不及防的情况下抓住他们。 

人们从自我防御培训班中学到的最好的事情是自信。你最后所想到的关于遭遇袭击的事情是：“我们真正能够将这些自我防御策略做到吗？”。 如果你已经进行了一些排练，那么在紧急情况下更容易做出行动。 

一个自我防御培训班应该为你提供练习的机会。如果你同一个朋友一起参加培训班，当课程结束后，你们可以继续互相演练所学技能，这样能清晰的长久的记住它们。

向当地的基督教青年会或者社区中心咨询是否开办这些课程。如果他们没有开办，他们可能可以告诉你哪里有这些。你的体育老师或者学校顾问可能也有这方面的大量信息。 

医学博士：斯蒂文 道森 审阅

审阅时间：2009年4月

self-defense

You've seen it in movies: A girl walks through an isolated parking garage. Suddenly, an evil-looking guy jumps out from behind an SUV. Girl jabs bad guy in the eyes with her keys — or maybe she kicks him in a certain sensitive place. Either way, while he's squirming, she leaps into her car and speeds to safety.

That's the movies. Here's the real-life action replay: When the girl goes to jab or kick the guy, he knows what's coming and grabs her arm (or leg), pulling her off balance. Enraged by her attempt to fight back, he flips her onto the ground. Now she's in a bad place to defend herself — and she can't run away.

Many people think of self-defense as a karate kick to the groin or jab in the eyes of an attacker. But self-defense actually means doing everything possible to avoid fighting someone who threatens or attacks you. Self-defense is all about using your smarts — not your fists.

Use Your Head
People (guys as well as girls) who are threatened and fight back "in self-defense" actually risk making a situation worse. The attacker, who is already edgy and pumped up on adrenaline — and who knows what else — may become even more angry and violent. The best way to handle any attack or threat of attack is to try to get away. This way, you're least likely to be injured.

One way to avoid a potential attack before it happens is to trust your instincts. Your intuition, combined with your common sense, can help get you out of trouble. For example, if you're running alone on the school track and you suddenly feel like you're being watched, that could be your intuition telling you something. Your common sense would then tell you that it's a good idea to get back to where there are more people around.

De-Escalating a Bad Situation

Attackers aren't always strangers who jump out of dark alleys. Sadly, teens can be attacked by people they know. That's where another important self-defense skill comes into play. This skill is something self-defense experts and negotiators call de-escalation.

De-escalating a situation means speaking or acting in a way that can prevent things from getting worse. The classic example of de-escalation is giving a robber your money rather than trying to fight or run. But de-escalation can work in other ways, too. For example, if someone harasses you when there's no one else around, you can de-escalate things by agreeing with him or her. You don't have to actually believe the taunts, of course, you're just using words to get you out of a tight spot. Then you can redirect the bully's focus ("Oops, I just heard the bell for third period"), and calmly walk away from the situation.

Something as simple as not losing your temper can de-escalate a situation. Learn how to manage your own anger effectively so that you can talk or walk away without using your fists or weapons.

Although de-escalation won't always work, it can only help matters if you remain calm and don't give the would-be attacker any extra ammunition. Whether it's a stranger or someone you thought you could trust, saying and doing things that don't threaten your attacker can give you some control.

Reduce Your Risks
Another part of self-defense is doing things that can help you stay safe. Here are some tips from the National Crime Prevention Council and other experts:

Understand your surroundings. Walk or hang out in areas that are open, well lit, and well traveled. Become familiar with the buildings, parking lots, parks, and other places you walk. Pay particular attention to places where someone could hide — such as stairways and bushes. 
Avoid shortcuts that take you through isolated areas. 
If you're going out at night, travel in a group. 
Make sure your friends and parents know your daily schedule (classes, sports practice, club meetings, etc.). If you go on a date or with friends for an after-game snack, let someone know where you're going and when you expect to return. 
Check out hangouts. Do they look safe? Are you comfortable being there? Ask yourself if the people around you seem to share your views on fun activities — if you think they're being reckless, move on. 
Be sure your body language shows a sense of confidence. Look like you know where you're going and act alert. 
When riding on public transportation, sit near the driver and stay awake. Attackers are looking for vulnerable targets. 
Carry a cell phone if possible. Make sure it's programmed with your parents' phone number. 
Be willing to report crimes in your neighborhood and school to the police. 

Take a Self-Defense Class
The best way — in fact the only way — to prepare yourself to fight off an attacker is to take a self-defense class. We'd love to give you all the right moves in an article, but some things you just have to learn in person.

A good self-defense class can teach you how to size up a situation and decide what you should do. Self-defense classes can also teach special techniques for breaking an attacker's grasp and other things you can do to get away. For example, attackers usually anticipate how their victim might react — that kick to the groin or jab to the eyes, for instance. A good self-defense class can teach you ways to surprise your attacker and catch him or her off guard.

One of the best things people take away from self-defense classes is self-confidence. The last thing you want to be thinking about during an attack is, "Can I really pull this self-defense tactic off?" It's much easier to take action in an emergency if you've already had a few dry runs.

A self-defense class should give you a chance to practice your moves. If you take a class with a friend, you can continue practicing on each other to keep the moves fresh in your mind long after the class is over.

Check out your local YMCA, community hospital, or community center for classes. If they don't have them, they may be able to tell you who does. Your PE teacher or school counselor may also be a great resource.

Reviewed by: Steven Dowshen, MD
Date reviewed: April 2009