关闭httpclient日志:谜男方法补充材料4/8

The Mystery Method
Get Attraction Members
Bonus Material 4 of 8
Hi guys,
It’s been a few days since you received our attraction tips. Today’s email course will review that, and then proceed to Qualification (Chapter 7).
Review (of Attraction)
The most important thing to do after you Open (Chapter 5) is start to build attraction. However, you will not always have the social freedom to jump from your opener into any random, unconnected attraction-building routine. Sometimes you will, especially as your skills develop. But if you’re not able to do this consistently, use a transition.
There are three types of transitions:
Content transitions – where you take something she says and develop a routine off of that
Observational transitions – where you “spontaneously” notice something about her or her group, usually while using non-verbal communication to appear to be about to leave the interaction. This can be something you genuinely notice or it can be a “cold read”
Phrasal transition – which is similar to no transition at all, but allows the use of a crutch like “that reminds of” or “that’s just like when” to connect two different conversational subjects. Note that there doesn’t actually have to be much of a relationship between these two subjects for this to work
These were covered extensively in the previous email. If you missed it, you can get an even more detailed breakdown in Chapter 6 of Magic Bullets. This is available for free as part of the downloadable sample chapter on the Magic Bullets page.
Sometimes it’s hard to keep track of everything that is going on when you first meet a woman, especially the first few minutes and especially while you’re first learning this stuff. Be patient, relax; you’ll get it eventually. For a great comprehensive overview of a master’s thought process and checklist as he goes through the first five minutes, check out The Don and Tenmagnet’s interview entitled (you guessed it) The First Five Minutes (CD version here; instant download here).
The previous email also covered Storytelling. Your stories will improve through repeated practice. One of the great things about storytelling (as well as body language) is that you can practice anywhere; you don’t need to wait for a beautiful woman to come along. A key point to remember with storytelling is to embed your DHVs in the story such that:
The story would be interesting and a story you could tell even without the DHVs
The DHVs appear to the listener to be incidental to the story and not its main purpose
The best resources for Storytelling are Chapter 18 (Storytelling) of Magic Bullets, which was also reprinted in the Love Systems' Routines Manual, and the interview with Sinn and Future on the subject (CD version here; immediate download here).
Discussion (Qualification)
Qualification, referred to as A3: Male to Female interest in the book, is a crucially important part of dating science.
Psychologically, it’s not enough for most attractive women to feel that just because they are attracted to you, that you are attracted to them. Women want to have to work for your interest. Or at least feel that they are working for your interest. And it’s your job to make sure that they do.
The book does a great job of explaining qualification theory, and has a generous number of examples. So for this email, we’ll instead look at some of this basic material from other angles to help internalize the concepts and make them flexible in your skillset. Try this once you are familiar with the basic concept.
Levels of Qualification
The list of qualification questions on p. 135 is great. Most of these are what we'd call "hard" qualifiers. A woman is going to have to be pretty interested in you or pretty compliant to answer most of these. [There are some exceptions – "do you like animals" and "how old are you" are softer qualifiers.]
What we sometimes find helpful to do is build a ladder of increasing compliance with our qualification questions by starting small (e.g., "are you adventurous"), building up a bit more later (e.g., "if you could be anything, with no fear of failure, what would you be?") and then leading to hard qualifier like: "what do you have going for you apart from your looks?"
Each of these qualification questions should be separated by a minute or two of discussion that isn’t obviously screening or qualifying. By doing this, you build momentum toward increasing compliance.
Validating the screen
The bait-hook-reel-release model (pp. 151-155) is a powerful tool and must be learned. Sometimes, however, on our bootcamps, we see students who apply it so rigidly that they lose credibility. It’s a good idea to explore your interest in a specific topic before releasing. This is the “reel” part of bait-hook-reel-release and it’s easy to gloss over it. However, you must convince her that she has genuinely done something to win your interest. If you ask her what she wants to be when she grows up and she tells you she’s studying at law school, you can’t simply say “that’s amazing” and then release her. If it was truly interesting to you that she was in law school, explain why. Were either of your parents lawyers? Did you grow up watching a law-based TV show? Whatever it is, make her feel that she has genuinely won your interest through her answer, and that she would not have gotten the same response with a different answer.
Qualification pinging
Try qualifying early in your set – when opening for example. Use a very soft qualifier and see if it takes hold. Many men, especially as they become familiar with the principles of dating science, are surprised by how early they get attraction from women. And you won’t know if you don’t test. So start testing whether early qualification works. If she doesn’t bite, just continue with attraction wherever you were.
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谜男方法补充材料4/8
翻译: qinsoon
获得吸引
伙计们好！
你们应该早就读过我所写的关于吸引的章节。我们今天的email教程将会复习这个，之后转向筛选与合格的话题（第7章）。
复习吸引
在你完成开场（Open，见第5章）之后，最重要的事情就是建立对女人的吸引力。但是大多数情况你不能从你的开场自由地转入其他毫无联系的建立吸引的惯例中去。也许当你的搭讪技巧达到一定水平后，你可以随心所欲的话题转换。但如果你还做不到，这里就向你提供一些转换话题的技巧。
通常我们把转换分为三种类型：
内容转换 - 从她说的内容中提炼，并根据此开始你的吸引惯例
观察转换 - 自然地提出一些关于她或者她所处的团体（组合）的事，通常搭配上非语言上的交流给人造成你即将离开这次谈话的感觉。至于你所提出的内容，既可以是你观察到的，也可以是冷读的结果。
惯用语转换 - 与不用任何转换直接切入新话题很类似，使用像“这让我想起……”“这就像……”等连接语来串起两个不同的话题。需要注意的是，这两个话题是否真正有什么联系，并不影响这种转换方式的行之有效。
这些在我的上一封email中也讲到了。如果你错过了上次email教程，你也可以在的第6章中找到更详细的话题转换方法的分类。这些可以在的网站上找到，它们作为免费试读的章节提供下载。
当你初次遇见某个女人时，有时很难留意到周围发生的或是你和她之间的每一件事，尤其在最开始的几分钟内或者你是初学搭讪的新人。不过试着放松心态，并且坚持学习，你最终定能成功。你也可以去看看The Don and Tenmagnet's的访谈，叫做“最开始的5分钟（The First Five Minutes）”，从中你可以学习到大师是如何处理搭讪的最开始的5分钟的，包括他的思想过程以及他脑中清晰的话题列表。
上一封email中也提到了讲故事的技巧。你必须通过反复练习、尝试、修改，来让你的故事更加吸引人。对于尝试学习的人来说，学习讲故事（还有就是学习身体语言）有一点优势——即使不在你的目标美女面前也可以练习，这样勤加练习可以帮助你快速掌握它们的技巧。对于讲故事来说，重要的一点是在你的故事中加入展示你DHV的元素。符合以下条件的，都属于在搭讪中合适的故事：
这个故事本身很有趣，那么即使其中没有DHV也可以
这个故事让听者感觉，是无意的DHV而不是刻意的
对于讲故事这种技巧，个人感觉最好的资源是的第18章，它也出现在中。也可以看看对Sinn and Future关于这个内容的访谈。
关于筛选与合格（Qualification）的讨论
筛选与合格的问题，我在<谜男方法>的A3：男对女的兴趣中讲到过，是约会学中重要的一部分。
从心理角度来讲，对于女人来说，仅仅感觉到你们之间的相互吸引是不够的。当女人希望确实在迎合你的兴趣，或者至少在试图为你的兴趣而付出时，你要做的事就是告诉她们，她们确实这样做了。这就是所谓的合格声明。
我在书中花了很大工夫阐释筛选与合格的理论，并且提供了大量例子。所以在这封email中，我们从一些基础的内容出发，从其他角度来内化这些概念并且让你可以灵活的运用这些技巧。当你熟悉了筛选合格的基础概念后，可以尝试阅读这些内容。
筛选的层次
在书中p135页（译注：DOC版第65页）中给出了一张合格问题的列表。其中大多数属于所谓的“硬”筛选问题。通过它们，女人会表现出对你的兴趣或是对你的问题的服从。（像“你喜欢动物吗”和“你多大了”这些属于软筛选问题。）
在赢得女人的过程中，很重要的一点是，你需要用这些筛选问题来建立一个逐步提升服从性的阶梯，你的筛选问题可以从简单的软筛选问题开始（如，“你喜欢冒险吗”），慢慢提升（如，“如果你可以成为任何你想成为的东西、人、动物，你会怎么选择？”），一直到最后提升到硬筛选问题，像“除了外貌之外，你还希望获得什么？”
每一个筛选问题都可以花一到两分钟讨论，以判断对方态度和对于筛选的反应。通过这样做，你就会逐步得到女人更高的服从性。
合格台词
“引诱—上钩—收线—释放”模型是一个有效的工具，每个立志于把妹的人都应该学会。有时，在我们举办的训练营中，看到学生僵硬地使用它以至于他们失去了女人的信任。在使用这个模型时要注意，在“释放”之前应当表露出你对她给出的特定话题的兴趣，这就是“收线”的部分，这个经常被学生忽视。不过它很重要，你需要让女人知道她确实在试图获得你的兴趣。例如，你问她，当她长大后打算做什么工作，她告诉你想去学习法律。你不能简单的回答“这太棒了”，然后就开始“释放”。如果她读法律的打算确实获得你的兴趣，你应该告诉她，向她解释——如，你父母是律师吗？你喜欢看一些讲法律的电视节目吗？无论对她说什么，只是让她知道，她通过她的回答确实赢得了你的兴趣，如果她继续这么做，也能同样获得你的好感。
合格回响
在你的搭讪总尽早的进行筛选，例如在开场时。可以用一些软筛选问题，看试探一下情况。很多人，尤其是那些熟知约会学原则的人，吃惊于他们能在很开始的时候就对女人产生了吸引。不亲身实践，你是不会发现这个的。所以，你可以在今后的搭讪中尝试更早的进行筛选，看看到底是什么结果。如果她没有上钩，那么继续回到吸引的阶段进行。